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This is a film that literally has no reason to exist besides the fact that they had access to these two beefcakes. The plot is the Conan rehash you undoubtedly knew it would be—two young children captured by an evil warlord and raised to become gigantic, musclebound gladiators must fight to take down his empire, blah, blah, blah. Hearing these giant guys in loin cloths speaking in a Jersey-like accent is pretty damn funny. There was a time in the mids when ninjas were just about the coolest possible characters for an American action movie. Thus, it becomes part The Exorcist and part inexplicable Godfrey Ho-style slice-em-up. It was a huge drive-in success, making more than 10 times its original budget in box office receipts.
I mean seriously, how great is that title? Terror character the fabulous Peter Cushing! Aboard the train, he reads the future and foretells the terrible deaths of five other men via tarot cards, in stories that run the gamut from werewolves to voodoo priests and man-eating garden vines. This film is essentially the consolation prize for two other failed film projects. Pyun director of the largely forgotten Captain America movie was initially contracted to shoot a sequel for the earlier Masters of the Universe He-Man adaptation, along with a best poker films of all time Spider-Man movie, but both projects had their funding stripped. After spending best poker films of all time on costumes for both films, however, the studio still wanted something to show for their troubles.
Enter Jean Claude Van Damme, playing a kickboxing badass in typical Van Damme fashion. Propelled by kickboxing, he utilizes kickboxing to kickbox his way through a post-apocalyptic landscape replete with kickboxers … and the occasional cyborg. And speaking of Masters of party poker casino login Universe … this film is insane!
Rushed to completion in in an attempt best poker films of all time boost flagging sales of He-Man action figures, it landed with a tie thud. Werewolf has just the right mix of low production gaming pc seiten fertig and shoddy acting that MST3k thrived on. Why do all the seemingly American characters have unidentifiable European accents? Shark movies are the absolute bottom of the barrel in the monster movie sub-genre, simply because there are so many of them. Seriously, I would wager that Jaws might qualify as the most-imitated film ever made as far as B movies are concerned, because every year there are at least a few new shark flicks. None of them come even close, though, to timee lunacy of Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. Plot is completely irrelevant; what matters are the astoundingly bad special effects.
Definitely one of the best premises for a Roger Corman-produced film, Death Race was cinema gold waiting to happen. The story of a dystopian future where all entertainment has been made into a huge cross-country race between psychotic drivers in weapon-toting cars, its basic story has been reused in dozens of rip-offs and official remakes, including the likes of The Hunger Games. Like a sleazy version of Children of Menthis movie imagines a world where nearly everyone is infertile, but the setting is much more like a cross between The Road Warrior and an episode of ThunderCats featuring the mutants. A very early best poker films of all time role for Hot Rod, who was always a better actor within the wrestling ring than in front of the camera.
This is actually one of the most coherent films from director Donald G. Jackson, a truly bizarre individual who we will learn more about shortly. John Phillip Law is the highlight as the oily, scenery-chewing villain, Kalgan, but you also get to marvel at see more big, dumb lump of man that is Dave Ryder. Every time this movie could pokre play it safe, it just doubles down again with the most absurd possible outcome, and I admire its chutzpah. Just watch this scene where FDR receives a custom-made werewolf-fighting wheelchair.
What follows is like a disturbed rendition best poker films of all time Greaseexcept the greasers are super-powered mutant monsters who hold the popular girls hostage. Like most Troma movies, it features disgusting but cleverly executed special effects, and was influential enough to spawn a whole family of uninteresting sequels that toned down the violence. It looks like it was shot on a flip phone camera and serves as proof that it takes more than good intentions to create a significant work of art. Best poker films of all time Mraovich actually created is a modern camp classic, especially in the gay community. This may truly be the quintessential s sci-fi B movie, a groundbreaking study in cheap moviemaking and innovative special effects, with an intriguing story to boot.
Doctors are unable to halt the progress, and Scott learns a powerful lesson about stigmatization. He eventually shrinks down to the size of an insect and faces life-and-death challenges within the perceived safety of his own house, running from a now terrifying housecat and battling a household spider. From a sincere s sci-fi B movie we turn to an inspired spoof. Satirizing s space movies and especially the work of Ed Wood, it succeeds like the earlier-mentioned Dark and Stormy Night because of its loving attitude, understanding of genre conventions and total commitment by the actors to a shared in-joke. Rarely has anyone made movies this fun with so few resources at their disposal. Blamire works with micro-budgets as well as anybody ever has. And as a true artist, Blamire is determined to press on. The final film on this list to be featured on MST3k, Time Chasers is a gloriously misguided time travel B movie.
The hero Nick is such a putz, rocking a hideous mullet and generally getting his ass kicked by everyone he encounters. The villain might as well be Skeletor in a business suit for how well he hides his scheme. The time travel segments are definitely highlights, like when they go all the way back to the American Revolution in order to mill around with war no deposit bonus code wearing mismatched uniforms. Plus they have the talents of Vincent Price as the descendent of a notorious madman—but how much evil runs in the family blood?
A sumptuous story of revenge across generations; check out the classic trailer. Remember when I called Hell Check this out to Frogtown one of the more coherent films by Donald G. This is why. The Roller Blade Seven pretty easily manages to be the most psychedelic, mind-bending film on this entire list—my attempts to describe here only hint at its profound weirdness. Essentially a remake here sequel to Coffy from a year earlier, Foxy Brown is pretty much that film with another layer of gritty blaxploitation appeal.
The beautiful Pam Grier is the hyper-sexual Foxy Brown, who goes on the warpath after her boyfriend is killed by members of a drug syndicate. Everyone ends up feeling her wrath, from pimps and dealers to men selling women into sexual servitude. And of course, there is the wonderful moment when she runs over some honkies in an airplane. Who knew that Brandon Lee made so many deliciously terrible films before The Crow? Laser Mission is the kind of film where you could predict 75 percent of the plot points before watching it—cool guy mercenary is sent on a dangerous mission, meets girl, falls in love, kills bad guy, roll credits. The trailer tells you best poker films of all time you need to know and then some. Year: Directors: Michael Herz and Lloyd Kaufman as Samuel Weil. It really serves as a template for the average Troma film, with over-the-top gore, crass language and unapologetic sexuality and titillation. Rumors of another sequel pop up every few years, but only Lloyd Kaufman knows for sure.
His character in Enter the Dragon made karate champion Jim Continue reading a star, probably the best-known black martial artist of his day. This naturally made him a shoo-in for the blaxploitation genreand within a few years he made some absolute classics, including Black Belt Jones and Three the Hard Way. Black Samurai was made a few years later and clearly felt the need to push things far past the boundaries of reality and into cartoonish excess. With no reservations, this is one of the best horror flicks of the s.
I truly believe that five years from now, Neil Breen will likely have inherited a place in the terrible movie hall of fame, alongside the likes of Ed Wood and Tommy Wiseau. The writer, producer and director of click to see more feature films, he is the sincere, bizarro filmmaker du jour of the information age. I Am Here…. Moron Movies is unlike every other entry on this list. Johnny Carson found them spellbindingly weird, to the extent that he featured Cella on the show several times between Before he was the Oscar-winning director casinos uk The Lord of the Rings or even the passable director of The FrightenersPeter Jackson was the Grand High Gore-Meister of New Zealand.
It starts out as a film more gross in its portrayal of the elderly than anything and then devolves from there into one of the grossest, bloodiest films ever made. Every method of zombie mutilation imaginable takes place in just over an hour and a half, including one with a lamp shoved into its skull like a jack-o-lantern. Nothing, though, can compare with the final scene, the infamous lawnmower massacre. Enter the Ninja best poker films of all time the first of the big American ninja B movies, the films that established so many stereotypes for hacks like Godfrey Ho to cash in on later.
Primary color jumpsuits? Throwing stars? Caucasian guy as the primary ninja hero? Every movie about silent warriors since then is in debt to this one. Let it be known: I love Glenn Berggoetz. Who is Glenn Berggoetz? His best-made film, though, is To Die is Harda shameless Die Hard parody about an English professor fighting terrorists on campus, in which he plays the lead role. Another Vincent Price vehicle with a great title, this one is anything but horror. Instead, this is a spoof of sorts on the spy movie genre, featuring Price as the nefarious Dr. Goldfoot, whose only defining characteristic is that he wears pointy gold shoes for no apparent reason. As you can probably tell from that description, the first Austin Powers movie actually owed a lot to this plot. Goldfoot is pure, unadulterated s camp of the highest order, always funny and never boring. I think one of the reasons Thankskilling works so well is the disconnect between the quality of its writing and direction vs.
It occurs to me that a lot of these films reek of the s—especially this one—but it was a banner decade as far as a certain subset of B best poker films of all time were concerned.